Hooked On Honest

So this shit pretty much cheered me up from my bad mood…..WATCH.

“FUCK YO ART!”

“FUCK YO ART!”

Dear Diary

This song seems to have replaced “All Of Me” as my favorite Mood Muzik 3 track. So I’m home in BKLYN at my gramma’s been chillin’ around with her & my cuzzins & friends all day. She cooked some Puerto Rican dishes for us today, of course my friends were afraid to try em but I ripped that shit apart. Haven’t had her cooking in so long. I definitely miss that. I just got done blog surfing, mostly from Twitter “friends”. I miss reading blogs daily so I added a few to my blog bookmarks via iPhone : Mars, Lyriciss, JF Kennedy, Deeteezy, Lizzy & NerdAtTheCoolTable.

We have plans to do something tonight, fun or trouble or both, whatever. I’m down, pause. I really need to get some rest though, I plan to be out for the next few days. Traveling is really a new air for me because at my residence or in the vicinity of my residence, I’m always so angry or stressed but once I’m away from all that, I’m at my happiest. Let me say, I may not have been to alot of places, various states, 5 countries, 2 continents. Out of all of those places, Brooklyn is still the most beautiful place ever. There’s really no place like home.

So after I showed my son how to Stanky Leg, D-Town boogie & Shimmy. He’s really stuck on that. His favorite is the Stanky Leg though, he sings that shit all the time. He even sings Soulja Boy “Turn My Swag On”. He’s really into shoes, not just sneakers but all types of shoes. Someone bought him some cowboy boots for Christmas & he refuses to take em off. Smh. Lol. That’s life right there.

This post is done, i’m audi. & I don’t know why but I can never keep my focus on Ocean’s 13. I think I’m gonna cop some more records tomorrow. I want some Prince records.

Best X-Mas Gift of ‘08.

“I’m in love with 2 women, the one that birthed me & the one that birthed her & know that you gotta hurt me before you hurt her or hurt her or hurt we, I curse thee the worsest death…” – Beanie Sigel

So today I received a bit of unexpected bad news, aside from the fact that I was already having a fucked up day as is. I was stone-faced & acting out because of the petty problems going on in my life. I admit I’m a little selfish at times & don’t take the people into consideration around me but I’m human right? Yeah I know. I was also upset over a X-Mas present but not just any present it was a present that I was really really looking forward to & my moms told me she wasn’t gonna be able to get it for me due to some other shit, so I’m mad as hell cause I already felt like since I’m away at school, that I’m like the outcast of the family. It was really just alot of built of tension between the whole household & I was trying my hardest to hold it in (remember my staying calm post? Okay.) Fast forward over other events that occured today & I had my son & younger siblings with me so I took them around the neighborhoods to see the Christmas lights & such. That shit just humbled my whole mood because I thought back to my childhood & how much I enjoyed the holiday. But as many know as your grow older, holidays don’t matter as much, or so well I thought.

So I said all that bullshit to say that the best gift that I received the whole year was my family. I don’t like them at times, I don’t get along with them alot of the times. But they’re the best thing that I could have this year, alot of people say haters or money are their motivation. Family is my motivation because they are my worse critics as well as my most loyal fans in whatever it is I do.

F Me? Why?!

That’s like going to Brooklyn screaming FBI! That’s actually a Budden line btw, um it’s off that’s um, damn I can’t think of it right now but I think it’s on Mood Music 1, yeahhhh it’s off of Fab’s “Breathe” track.  Before I get into anything this, peep the video.

I usually don’t have the time to stay up on whatever is poppin’ on the internet, not even music. I hardly ever anticipate shit like I said in the previous post, there is really no good music dropping. Wake me up when this nightmare ends or somebody drops something hot. But back to the topic, when the shit originally hit the net or whatever, I got a txt from my homie like “Joe Budden said Fuck New York.” Yeah yeah, niggas trying to rub it in my face cause they know Budden is my 2nd fav. rapper post 2000. I wasn’t even bothered by the shit, I just happen to be on YouTube today & ran across it. I agree with everything he’s saying, not Fuck New York but the rest….& if you’re from NY you know he’s spittin’ real shit.

Charles Hamilton vs. Soulja Boy?

This shit right here is just plain ridiculous. I’m gonna call it how I see it man, this shit is like high school & Soulja Boy is the popular underclassman who the cool upperclassmen don’t like. Every time I turn around, he’s being bashed about something. The shit could have nothing to do with him & he’ll be brought into the discussion. Crank That? That shit is going on 2 years ago, his music buzz has died down alot but his drama buzz is always poppin’. What kinda shit is that though? I don’t see niggas hoppin’ on Yung Joc, DJ UNK & whoever else comes up with little relevant dances nowadays. I think it’s just another case of let’s punk the little nigga. He stands his ground I know that much. Before any one of you motherfuckers try to say ah shit Deuce is buggin’ out, music wise I prefer Charles Hamilton, pause. I knock some of Soulja Boy’s shit too. I was knockin’ duke before he made it big. My LB ( what up Bestest…pause ) put me up on him, pause when the original Yah & I Got Me Some Bathing Apes dropped.

Zooted.

I have one question : DO YOU FOOLS LISTEN TO MUSIC OR DO YOU JUST SKIM THRU IT? Because I don’t give a shit what no one says or tries to make me think. 808’s & Heartbreaks is not a good album….nothing against the auto-tune, “Who killed it? Was it T-Pain with that funny voice shit, was it Lil’ Wayne with that funny voice shit, the whole game dick rode that funny voice shit!” -Joe Budden. Back to my opinion, once you’re established yourself or proven yourself to the game….you can drop a sack of bullshit & people will swear up & down it’s the shit. I think with the lack of good music being exposed or put emphasis on, it’s okay for people to drop mediocre music & it being seen as great. But it’s not memorable. Its not mentioned in the same breath of the classics. I’m a Jay-Z stan so I’m gonna use ‘The Blueprint’ as an example. When I first heard that album on bootleg it didn’t have to grow on me or nothing, it was an instant classic in my head. I had to cop that on release day. That shit that plays over & over in my head even when the music is off, I would find myself mumbling the lyrics to myself. Even more recently when I first heard Nigger by Nas, I could just throw that joint on & let it bang on my speakers…pause. The first time I heard Little Brother – Separate But Equal (Gangsta Grillz), it had me really checkin’ for them, the next day I copped The Minstrel Show along with Ray Cash’s debut “Cash On Delivery”. 2 timeless classics in my opinion.

Ay Guru, put a little T-Pain in my shit, I PUT ONNNNNNNN! Nah fuck that I don’t need no T-Pain on my shit! But I think there’s no pressure at all on these artists such as Beyonce & Kanye, they can drop anything & still be one of the most respected in the game. & I don’t even think it’s the music, it’s the grind & work ethic. Beyonce gets on stage for like 2 hours at a time just going hard. Who can do that? Kanye has theme shows, stories & shit. Even Soulja Boy, he has his little dance shit poppin’ off attracting thousands at shows. It’s about the grind….that goes to show you how power is over respect.

UPDATE:

Okay I’m eating my words, cause I knock 808’s & Heartbreaks regularly, especially when I’m elevated.

Mystery Of Iniquity

My favorite joint off of the Unplugged album! I’m kind of upset that I can’t sleep cause once I do sleep, I’m gonna crash & I planned on going to church today. Grrr, I don’t like when things aren’t working in my favor such as now. I live a good life, it’s okay. I’m good for the most part but being away at school then coming back to the city for a few days has my mind running eveywhere. The good shit is that I can get more shit done, I’m more relaxx’d & it’s a different scenery. On the other hand, there’s the major large cities in which I’ve lived in for most of my life. Full of opportunities. Alot of missed opportunities on my part because I’m handling the school thing. It almost depresses me because I’ll come back & see a “miss”. In the back of my mind I’m like damn I had that! Then the thought of me “counting my blessings” brings that to a halt. But that shit making me feel like I’m failing. But nah I can’t be failing….I’m a year & a half away from receiving a degree. I’m evolving. Learning everyday. Growing everyday. But while I’m doing all of this, there’s no room for me to do the other shit I feel is important to me. I feel like hey, I make more than enuff sacrifices, so why isn’t luck playing on my team for a change. I don’t know……all of this shit going on in my life, I’m just trying to understand something, anything.

Stay tuned….

5 Confessions @ 1AM

1. I’m currently listening to Pretty Ricky – Up & Down….pause

2. I felt on Solange’s thigh under the dinner table during Thanksgiving dinner prayer (sorry Bey Bey)

3. I’ve never thought about wearing a pair of Kanye’s…..the “stronger” shades.

4. My fam called me Hollywood cause I’ve switched up my style of dress. I’ve been on button ups since Jay slayed throwbacks back in ‘03 (chu want me to do? I’m sorry!) beasty!

5. I procrastinate way too fuckin’ much!!! Okay so I should start on my 3 speeches. Yup.

No Matter What They Say

I woke up today & decided that I am not celebrating thanksgiving & I have yet to tell somebody happy thanksgiving….just happy nov 27th. I refuse to celebrate the day europeans raped my ancestors (native americans). The story doesn’t even sound real or make sense so whatever. But what I am gonna do is enjoy this time with my family & eat a little bit. I’ve never really been a fan of thanksgiving food. Don’t eat swine so I’m limited. I’m looking good as shit today though…minus the baldy but my C Reds fitted, got me covered on that dilemma. But hands down I wish I could’ve spent this weekend in Louisiana again like last year. I’m good though. It’s a beautiful day, I’m surrounded by beautiful people & I may end up drunk or having to puff an L at the end of the day but it’s all good. Now I’m off to do 90 on the freeway listening to Lil’ Boosieana. Wait, gotta think about Biscuit & ‘nem….let me slow my roll!

No More Fun & Games

This post was inspired by observations & a current convo that I’m having with a friend. Me & this friend fell out due to her relationship….you know how that can be. I even remember covering this discussion last semester in my Effective Learning class, losing yourself to the point when it ends you have to ask yourself who am I?

As I’ve stressed before, relationships are about companionship, you have to love yourself first….the love you have for yourself should be below nothing. Don’t become a danger to yourself mentally & physically over a relationship. That love & security that comes with a relationship is what we all need, everybody does even me no matter how hard I deny it. Love does that to us, sucks us dry. It’s the same thing that will make you feel like you’re in a higher echelon & within mins will drag you back down to the reality of everything.

At some point in any relationship, whether it’s a teacher-student, boyfriend-girlfriend, father-son relationship, each party will be put into many positions to compromise something. Compromising is okay to an extent, only if it’s beneficial.

Love & relationships are both some beautiful shit but I think the negativity that contains me & the baggage that comes with them is what make them unattractive. “Got people steady asking, how could I go to sleep mad, the next wake up so happy…love ain’t always complicated…”